As you can see my phone is half as big as my foot. There is only one word for it - ridiculous. My own father laughed at me, he told me his phone from the 90’s was smaller. Then he took pity and offered me his new phone. I’m still suffering. I bought it in a fit of panic; it was all I could get within walking distance. Clearly, I was very desperate.
The thing about this ‘phone’ is that it has a life of its own. It’s sort of like a pubescent teenager: it has attitude, it works when it wants, it calls who it wants and it has the most annoying habit of gabbing away in its static voice, drowning out everything else. Not only that but it’s extremely bipolar. It will unexpectedly throw its suicidal self out of my hands and bust into 4 pieces; only to mock me by coming back to life when put back together.
I hate the damn thing.
Additionally, it's hideous. It’s like one of those giant squashed bugs you see on the road and you can’t look away because the grotesqueness has left you dumb founded and amazed. All it needs is a retainer and the awkwardness will be complete.
The thing about this ‘phone’ is that it has a life of its own. It’s sort of like a pubescent teenager: it has attitude, it works when it wants, it calls who it wants and it has the most annoying habit of gabbing away in its static voice, drowning out everything else. Not only that but it’s extremely bipolar. It will unexpectedly throw its suicidal self out of my hands and bust into 4 pieces; only to mock me by coming back to life when put back together.
I hate the damn thing.
Additionally, it's hideous. It’s like one of those giant squashed bugs you see on the road and you can’t look away because the grotesqueness has left you dumb founded and amazed. All it needs is a retainer and the awkwardness will be complete.
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