I am not photogenic; during one brief 2 year period in the past I was photo-adequate; as in people were ok with sharing pictures with me and did not feel like I ruined that memory. That was in the past; post-puberty and pre-super stress life.
Unfortunately, those years are behind me and also unfortunately this lack of photogenicity is only amplified a million times on I.D card pictures. In fact it is so ridiculous that I usually don’t even look like the real life me on my ID cards. Once, a customs official looked back and forth at my picture and me for a solid minute before deciding that it must have just been a bad day and I was indeed the same person.
In my defense, on the Canadian passport picture we are not allowed to smile and instead must maintain a neutral expression. I’m not sure what a neutral expression is, but whatever I interpreted it as, has me captured in film looking like a constipated criminal.
I was hoping I could surmount this rather awful lack of photo talent on my hospital I.D badge, after all I would be wearing this on my lapel for the next 3 years and as you all know during residency things in the looks department only go downhill.
People should be able to look at my I.D badge and think, “Man, at one point this was a regular looking person, maybe things have just been really rough and that explains her current status.”
I really wish there were do-overs in life, I would use that pass on that fateful day I had my I.D picture taken. The I.D picture was taken the same day the ‘pee fiasco’ occurred, read here for more details. So, in summary on my I.D I look vampire pale, and for some reason my cheeks are super flushed and my mouth is inexplicably garishly red. I’m glad I never have to look at it, and in a few months when everyone knows my name I’m going to flip it over.
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